Sleep – it’s the nightly escape from our current life, and a journey into the mysterious realm of our unconscious. Dreams can be a delightful stroll down memory lane or a turbulent rollercoaster ride of emotions. And what’s the deal with those dreams where you have your ex suddenly pop up, causing a whirlwind of negative feelings? It’s a common dream, but does it mean you secretly want to get back together? Research shows that there’s more to it than meets the eye, and we’re here to decode the mysteries of dreaming about an ex and what it means for your love life.
Before we jump into the intriguing meanings of dreams about your ex, why not kickstart your dream analysis journey with a 7-day trial of the ShutEye sleep app? Within our app, you’ll find an extensive dream library. This library is packed with daily interpretations and insights into the hidden meanings behind your dreams. Ready to get started? Download ShutEye for Android and iOS today.
What does it mean when you dream about ex?
Dreaming about an ex is actually really common — and it might not mean what you think. If you’ve found yourself wondering why your brain keeps bringing up a certain person when you’re asleep, one (or more) of these reasons might explain it. Let’s discover all of them!
1. If it’s a recent ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend
It may appear like your mind is attempting to undo all of your hard work in the waking hours to get over this individual.
However, your subconscious is actually attempting to assist you in healing and processing your feelings about the split.
2. If your ex was physically or verbally abusive
A common response to trauma is having recurring dreams about an abusive or toxic ex. These nightmares may persist because you’re grappling with the lasting questions surrounding the past. They can also signify a fear of potentially repeating a similar relationship in the future.
3. If it’s an ex from a long time ago
It’s very typical to have dreams about a long-ago ex, especially a first love – old flame. That ex becomes a symbol for passion, unbridled desire, fearless love, and so on.
This is your unconscious mind’s way of informing you that you need more love in your life.
4. If you or your ex is expressing regret
If your former lover apologizes in your dream, it doesn’t necessarily indicate that he or she is genuinely sorry in reality. Instead, it’s your mind creating a scenario wherein your ex speaks precisely the words you wished he or she had expressed.
5. If your ex misses you or you miss him or her
Dreams about an ex don’t necessarily indicate they miss you or vice versa. They primarily reflect your own emotions and fond memories, can be symbolic or random, and should be understood in the context of your feelings, not your ex’s.
6. If you’re getting back together
If you would, it’s time to spend some time remembering why you broke up in the first place. Likely, there were some pretty good reasons! (A therapist or a protective BFF can be very helpful here).
If, however, in your waking hours, you have ZERO interest in said ex-partner, the dream is a sign that you’ve made peace with the past relationship and learned the lessons you needed to learn from it. Exciting!
7. If you dream about physical reconnection with your ex
Dreams about an ex getting physical can be indicative of sexual desires, unfulfilled passions, or a longing for intimate connections. They might represent unresolved sexual tensions, a desire to rekindle physical intimacy, or metaphorical expressions of personal growth in your sexual life. These dreams could also be a response to sexual frustration or anxiety in your waking life.
The specific details of the dream and your own feelings during and after the dream, as well as your current sexual life and relationships, should be considered for a more accurate interpretation.
8. If you dream about your ex sleeping with someone else
Dreams about an ex-partner sleeping with someone else can symbolize emotional separation and the closure of a past relationship. It might indicate your subconscious mind coming to terms with the fact that your ex has moved on or that you should do the same. These dreams could also reflect feelings of jealousy, insecurity, or the fear of being replaced.
However, they do not necessarily provide insight into your ex’s real-life actions or emotions. Instead, they are typically a reflection of your own emotional landscape and the need to process and accept the end of that chapter in your life.
9. If you dream about your ex rejecting you
Dreams of an ex rejecting you can be emotionally charged. It doesn’t mean that you’re feeling rejected by your ex partner. It often reflects feelings of insecurity, self-doubt, or lasting emotional wounds from the past relationship. These dreams may signify a need for closure or a desire for validation and acceptance, even after the relationship has ended.
It’s essential to remember that these dreams typically represent your own emotions and vulnerabilities rather than reflecting your ex’s current feelings or actions. They might also indicate a fear of rejection in future relationships or a longing for a sense of closure and self-acceptance.
Why you’re dreaming about your ex?
Of course, it’s only natural to wonder the reason behind your dreams, and your curiosity probably doubles when someone unexpected pops up. But even if you’re happily in a new relationship and with your current partner, it’s not that strange if you see an ex or two in your dreams. Anyway, let’s discover common reasons of a dream about an ex.
1. You’ve unresolved feelings toward your ex
Before you get too worried about this one, remember that these feelings don’t necessarily have to be romantic. Dreaming about an ex could mean that you’re seeking closure. Perhaps you’re unsettled by the way things ended between the two of you, you feel guilty, or you’re still trying to process how your relationship ended in your mind.
If that’s the case, try to resolve unfinished business with your former partner to find peace.
2. You’re worried about being successful in a new relationship
If you’re entering into a relationship with a new person, your psyche may still be trying to sort out the pluses and minuses of your old relationship. In this situation, your psyche is trying to ensure success with your current relationship.
3. It’s a symbol of a bigger problem
So basically, if you’re dreaming about your ex, think about why your relationship ended and what you could have done differently. If it was your fault — and even if it wasn’t — sorting that out and preventing it from happening in future relationships could put these dreams to an end.
4. You’re afraid someone else will hurt you again
For a lot of people, getting over an old relationship is difficult, simply because it comes with the fear of being hurt the same way again — especially if your breakup was particularly brutal. That might have something to do with your ex guest starring in your dreams.
The dream might even be your way of realizing a new relationship is going down the same path. That might mean that you need to do what you can to change the relationship’s course, or that you haven’t had full emotional closure.
5. You’re trying to forgive them after a bad breakup
If things between the two of you didn’t end well and there was never an opportunity for forgiveness, the dream could be your brain’s way of creating that opportunity for you. It might represent the fact that you need to make peace with your ex partner. Want the dreams to stop? Forgive your ex when you’re awake and conscious, and that might just do it.
If you experience dreams about your ex, it’s essential to remember that they may not always be directly related to your ex. These dreams often leave us with a powerful feeling, as if we’re reliving a moment from the past.
Understanding the different meanings behind these dreams is crucial. It’s not just about your ex; it’s about what’s beneath the surface of your subconscious.
If you’re finding it difficult to sleep due to these vivid dreams about your ex, you’re not alone. The good news is that there are effective solutions to help you get a restful night’s sleep. One such solution is ShutEye, an all-in-one sleep app designed to tackle this common issue. ShutEye provides a wide range of tools to assist you in falling asleep naturally. Moreover, it helps you understand your sleep cycles from a scientific perspective.
Say goodbye to those restless nights filled with tossing and turning. Instead, start experiencing the bliss of falling asleep in a healthy and natural way with ShutEye.
Check more dream interpretations:
What if I continue to dream about my late husband .. in my dream he is really alive and I’m keeping a secret from the kids(and world) . My oldest son caught him alive and is mad, threatening to tell the other 4 kids, when arguing and crying with my son I wake up. I’ve had this dream several times in the past year, even though he has been gone since September 25 2017. I know that my husband passed away, I found him, only stating this so you know there is no option of my dream being real
Wanting to believe someone is not really gone
In your dreams it is the only real way their spirit can live on you can see them in a way you did before their passing, not wanting to tell the children is your inner instincts as a mother
Shielding your children from the pain of reality
The eldest knowing- you knowing your eldest is old enough to process the pain and what is happening is why in the dream he finds out
But the younger children don’t and him threatening to tell is your subconscious
Mind dealing with the pain of your younger children not really knowing the full extent of what is going on
I have repeated dreams about an ex who died 1year after a hard split up. My spouse now gave me the news of his death. It was extremely hard for me because we had been best friends also but couldn’t continue the relationship. I always dream we are talking and laughing and having a good time. After he always tells me everything will be good or okay. Then something always happens in my real life. Such as when I married my spouse or got pregnant, when I graduated college and when my granddaughter was born. What does this mean? I do think about him a lot when I am awake also.
From what I’ve learned through talking with mediums, these dreams are his way of letting you know he has been by your side celebrating all the great things in your life. He’s with you! He’s happy for you!❤️
Finding out someone you love or care for has passed is a trauma within its self, you dream of him in better times when you laughed and had fun together this is your subconscious telling you how you remember your ex in fun times
Where your ok and you laughed together
Your remembering the positive side to this person and allowing their memory to live
On as a positive reminder,you cared deeply for this person and there for you see him in reminders that are special to you.
You wanting to believe he has been by your side
Watching you grow. His spirit lives on and watches over you, our subconscious creates amazing memories. It sounds like you never really healed or got over his passing away xx
so i keep having a dream that my ex is being super nice to me and trying to get back with me even though we both are in a new relationship. thibgs didn’t end to well when we broke up so im confused.
I have dreams of me going into my exs house uninvited. I just walk in. My ex has a new girlfriend and we argue in my dream about just walking into their home. But his kids still visit with me. And sometimes I’m there to take care of him because he has Cancer, all of this is only in my dreams. What is going on??
My husband passed away 11 months, ago and I had. Had a dream of him a few times what does that mean before he passed away our marriage was not good we had problems he ended in the hospital never thought he wasn’t going to make it was a shock to me and the kids.
I’m having nightmares about my ex who beat me up, beat my daughter up and killed my son he was only 11 weeks old.
I dream about him beating me up and knocking me out. This did happen in real life quite a few times, I tried to get away but he would always find me and pull me back by my hair then he would beat me. On the night my little boy died, I was down stairs getting my daughter out of her pushchair, my ex called me and said that there was something wrong with my baby boy, I went to him he was floppy and turning blue. I started pressing on his chest and mouth to mouth resuscitation, he came back went back to being pink, the ambulance turned up and took him, myself and my ex to the hospital. A friend looked after my daughter,.
When we got to the hospital my baby had started going blue again, they rushed him through to resus, then police turned up arrested me and my ex. I didn’t know what had happened, my baby was transferred to the John Radcliffe hospital in Oxford, where he was put on life support. The police let me go, because I didn’t know what had happened, both my daughter and son(baby) were put on the at risk register. I went to live with my mum & dad, I visited my daughter in care and also my son in hospital. I day later I popped to see my sister, while I was there I went really cold, so I asked my mum and dad to take me back to theirs, when I got back there had been a phone call from the hospital to say my baby boy had died, I screamed then fell to the floor, we had a funeral for him which was heartbreaking.
I went to court to get my daughter out of care, it’s then that I found out my ex has thrown my baby against the wall and shattered his brain. This happened is 1984. I got my daughter out of care on the 6th December 1984, my grandma passed away the day my daughter came home xx my mum died Boxing Day 2017, my mother in law died 3rd of April 2018 and my dad died on the 10th April 2019, seen then I’ve been having these nightmares .
All I keep doing is having nightmares, my new husband wakes me up because of the screaming.
Trauma, it can make you dream like these, you have to find the strength to forgive you. To let things go, you couldn’t control the faith of your child, it is not your blame. Let things go, forgive yourself. You will start healing everyday. Be strong be kind.
I had a dream about my ex that we went on a trip with my Cousins and siblings and we were all just hanging out and then me ex grabbed my hand and then we just kissed and got back together and we spent the whole day together (but why this dream were not on really good terms right now )